Chronicles of an Over Tired Mommy

Blog

2006-03-29T22:29:00.000-05:00

I was finding it a bit of a hassle to keep up with both blogs. Since I paid for LJ that'll be my primary one. Be sure to check it out!

Weekend Update...

2006-01-16T22:58:00.000-05:00

Today was a relaxing day. We didn’t do much. We did drop the kids off with MIL so that we could go for a ride on the Harley. My back was hurting, and the ride was a bit of a disappointment.
Amberielle had fun and she got to play with some of the kids in MIL’s neighborhood. They were definitely NOT a good influence on my daughter… we got home and she called her father “stupid”. This is not something that we tolerate in my house. Certain words are a major no-no, not just for kids, but also for adults… that is one of them. I know that she picked it up from one of those kids because when we got there, she ran to me and told me that the boy in the green shirt called her stupid and made her sad.
Then later she started talking about sex… or more specifically, people having sex. Fabulous! She’s five years old! Tom thinks it’s about time for me to have “the talk” with her, but I am so not ready for this. I don’t know who to handle it!
And her not hanging out with the kids is a MIL battle that I’m not willing to fight right now!
Well yesterday was quite a day. Wyatt has been climbing out of his crib for many months now. Thankfully he has always hurled himself out bedside. After much consideration, we came to realize that it’s only a matter of time before he goes other-side… we’ve had a few close calls, so yesterday Tom went up into the attic and brought down Amberielle’s old toddler bed. I scrubbed it down numerous times… as I did with the booster seat… I did this outside even though it was freaking cold out(!) while I did that I also scrubbed down the high chair so that can go into the attic. My hands were so frigid that I could barely move them… I would have also done the walker while I was doing everything else, but it does actually get cold here in Florida. The bed is satisfactorily cleaned (I love OxyClean!) and all set up! Wyatt was a little concerned when he saw is crib leaving our room. I think he was more concerned about where his crib toys would go though. He’s getting so big and I’m not too sure if I’m ready for him to be out of the crib. It makes me so sad when I think that another baby may not sleep in that crib… or another one of my babies. : (
Lately he’d wake in the middle of the night, get a drink of water and go right back to sleep… in his crib. He’d climb out of the crib and into our bed between 500-530am. Last night in the bed he woke for his water, but promptly climbed into the big bed. He curled up with me and fell asleep. My arm fell asleep and was killing me. I was afraid that without a crib barrier he’d roll out of the bed, so I just put him back in his bed… and that continued all night long. He definitely has more of a sense of freedom in his new bed.
I shaved Tom’s head today. He’s a sexy bald man now! Amberielle was quite disappointed and kept saying that she liked her Daddy the other way… the Daddy with hair! Although she has enjoyed rubbing his head! lol!
Amberielle has a Dick and Jane book that she is reading ALL BY HERSELF! Yay! She is over 100 pages into it so far! I am so unbelievably proud of her. She has only needed help with a few of the words… and they are hard words like “something” She is doing so well, and it makes me so proud to be a homeschooling mommy!
Speaking of homeschooling, my worry is what will happen if I go back to school. Will I be able to take care of my education as well as hers? Will I have time for both?
I need to find a source of income… I really do. I need something that I can do from home, and make some decent regular money with. I’m sick of feeling as though I don’t contribute… I know that I take care of the kids, and cook and clean, but when money gets tight, I feel guilty. I’m sick of money occasionally getting tight. I’m sick of having panic attacks when it does get tight. I’m sick of mentally selling things when money does get tight. Hubby hates it when I get myself so worked up, and is constantly telling me that I need not worry because he will always take care of everything, but I can’t help but worry. I’m a worrier by nature. I think that if I could find a source of at home income it would help me feel as though I have more control in the situation and help alleviate my guilt somewhat.

Stay away from the crackpots and other family tales...

2006-01-12T22:53:00.000-05:00

Stay away from the Crackpots…
I had the outer shell of my crock pot on a low shelf. It was within baby reach, so it shouldn’t have been there, but it was just the outer shell, not any ceramic of glass pieces. Wyatt of course wandered over and stuck his head in and began sniffing… apparently looking for yummy smelling tidbits? Amberielle, always the motherly figure to him, goes over and tries to pull him away telling him to “Stay away from the crackpots!” I just about wet myself and replied, “He can’t… he’s a part of this family!”

My husband…
I’m sitting on the couch last night while T put His Princess to bed. He walks over to sit next to me and announces that he has just realized something, “God, I love these two kids more than I ever thought possible!” He had one of those WOW! moments of parenthood. Him, the man who swore he’d never have kids, and he’d never get married… and then he met me! : ) Now he’s been (hopefully! lol!) happily married for over five years and two children who think that he hung the moon. <3

Once Upon A Potty

2006-01-11T19:21:00.000-05:00

Well, My Dukes is already showing signs of potty readiness. He takes off his diapers and promptly does his business on my floors… tinkle in the living room and poops in the dining room. At least he knows when he has to go. So over the weekend we went to Walmart and bought him a potty. No pressure, but it’s half in the living room and half in the dining room, so we’re covered. He was asleep when we assembled it, but as soon as he woke up I walked him over to it, took off pants and diaper and waited… sure enough he tinkled and the potty played him a song. We all clapped and made a huge deal. I took out the bowl to dump and clean it. While I was doing that he peed again on the rug in the living room… and while I was cleaning that up, he peed yet again in the hall.
It’s been an up and down adventure. Sometimes he makes it, sometimes he doesn’t. Sometimes he sits on the potty and tinkles while still fully clothed, other times he chooses to just stand in the potty and do nothing. Sometimes he’ll take off the diaper, sit on the potty, read a book, play around, stand up and then pee on my floor.
I’m happy that he’s showing interest in the potty, but I’m also sad. He very well may be my last baby, and he already is striving to be a big boy. Not to mention that this puts a huge damper on my cloth diaper addiction! Eek! Hubby has currently said that if Mr Man is so interested in the potty he cannot see spending money on more diapers that we really don’t absolutely need! *hyperventilating* But the sales! But the cute cloth covered bum! But the fluffy mail! Oy! I don’t think I am ready for this. I may NEED to have another baby just for the diapers! Did I just say that?

Pain in the neck...

2006-01-10T21:06:00.000-05:00

I am once again, beyond tired… and I have this stomach bug again. I got over it before, and then my daughter got it, and gave it back to me as soon as she was done. Hey, at least she shares! Luckily my son has been spared. I just don’t think I could handle that at all right now.
Last night was such a bad night for the boy. He was tossing and turning all night long. He kept waking up and not for his usual drink of water. He’d climb out of the crib and into the bed, and I was so not in the mood to cosleep. He would lie with his head on MY pillow and scream and cry until I got my head of MY pillow. So I was uncomfortable and unable to sleep. He’d turn so that he’d be perpendicular to me and then I’d lose possession of my body pillow which would become his head pillow, my head pillow would become his leg pillow, and I’d get continuously kicked in the head, neck and breasts. I spent much of the night pleading with a 17 month old and essentially asking him to not kick the boobies that feed him.
I think that a large part of his problem is the fact that he cannot get comfortable in his crib. *sigh* Maybe one of these days we’ll get him a twin bed and he’ll be more comfortable and have more room and will in turn sleep better. Add that to the list with new dishwasher of things desired, but not quite needed.
And as a result of last night, my neck is killing me and I cannot turn my head. Hubby called and asked if he should work overtime tonight, and as much as we need the money, I need help with the kids. I am in so much pain, my patience in wearing thin, and baths and stuff need to be taken care of.

So, my stepmother arrived with her daughter. It still stands that she will not baby sit my children. Part of me feels guilty and unsure of how to say that there is a lack of trust without hurting feelings. And part of me just doesn’t care.

Well, T went into see his ENT today. His tonsils are still unbelievably infected that they don’t want to remove them until they take care of that. So he’s on a stronger antibiotic for the next two weeks, and then we’ll find out more.

I have having such a hard time being the sole adult in the house for dinner time. When my parents lived here it was so easy. I always had someone here to watch the kids while I cooked. Now that it’ just the three of us, since Tom doesn’t get home until late, and there is no way I’m making my kids wait until it’s nearly bedtime to eat dinner. So now, I’m trying to get us on a schedule where we’re eating earlier than we were while my parents were here, since I no longer have to politely wait for them to get here before eating. I’m having such a hard time getting myself motivated to start cooking earlier though. I have no idea why. I’m also having a hard time with the actual act of cooking dinner. It seems like every time I get on the kitchen side of that baby gate, one child hurts the other, or my mommy-sense starts to tingle and I know that they are doing something that they are not supposed to, or they’re at the baby gate begging for undivided attention, or drink, or drinks with ice, or drinks that don’t have that much ice in them, or… It’s endless. The crock pot has actually been a savior lately. I’m thinking about getting two so that I have a back-up for when one is soaking from a particularly messy stuck-on dinner. I knew I should have kept the second one that we got for our wedding. Ah well, I never really expected to use the one that we kept.

Well, my neck is hurting, so I guess I’m going to run and relax, make some tea and maybe do some scrapbooking or read a book.

Better Late Than Never...

2006-01-06T22:38:00.000-05:00

Well, it’s 2006, so I guess maybe I should do my year in review before it’s, like June and would just seem like a silly thing to do.

In no particular order…
In 2005…

~I lost some friends… not to death, so there’s no need completely “Oh dear!” me. My life is better off without so much negativity.
~I found out who my real friends are, and who is worthy of my time, energy and love.
~I got my father (and subsequently, my stepmother) to move to Florida. He lived with us for 10 months and her for nine. I treasure the memories of the times that I had with him alone before she moved down.
~My baby girl turned 5 years old! : ( I cried. But I also finally finished writing her birth story. She had a lovely Strawberry Shortcake party by the way.
~My son turned, my baby boy turned one. I cried hysterically. : ( He had a fun Elmo party… but let me say, red frosting on an Elmo cake is a bad idea for a first birthday, or any baby party for that matter, my son was dyed red for days!
~I went through so much anguish as my son had to undergo surgery to repair a hydrocele. Again, I cried hysterically. He was of course fine and healed well, but I am a mommy and my heart was broken as it is whenever my children experience any pain.
~I began to conquer a deep yet paralyzing irrational fear… driving. I’m getting there. I am able to go out alone if I have to. I can take my kids to some activities and to the doctors if need be!
~I started Neurofeedback for seizure control. I stopped going when things got busy and the office seriously annoyed me. I may return at some point, I may not. I don’t know.
~I began contemplating my future and going back to school. Potentially to be a labor and delivery nurse, maybe a midwife, maybe a superhero! We shall see!
~My husband and I celebrated 5 wonderful years of marriage together. <3
~I began officially unofficially homeschooling my daughter. Officially because we get up, get dressed, follow a lesson plan and sit at the table. She gets out her backpack each morning and occasionally gets a nutritious lunch out of her Barbie lunch box. Unofficially because technically she missed the “standard cut-off age” to start school by one week. She is doing so well, and amazes people with her intelligence and wit. I am so proud! : )
~We made the full conversion early in the year to cloth diapers for my son. It has saved us so much money… or would if I didn’t have an addiction, and is so much better for the environment.
~I have made it well past the six month mark with breastfeeding my son. Here we are at 17 months, still going strong! Yay us! : )
~And it was a seizure-free year! Yay!

I think that’s it for 2005. It could have been better, but it also could have been a hell of a lot worse, so I’m not complaining.

So frustrated!

2006-01-05T23:04:00.000-05:00

Did I post my stove issues here? I don’t remember… Anyway, a recap… Many months ago, my step mother was surface cleaning my stove and the numbers around the oven dial started to come off. The numbers are actually on the back of the stove and not the knobs. She was really upset and actually cried. We were able to salvage the lines and enough of the numbers so that with a metallic paint pen, I was still able to bake. From then on out we were very careful while cleaning the stove. Recently, I was cleaning the stove as I had many times with some Dawn… not a harsh abrasive or anything! I squeezed a little bit of water over the oven dial and whoosh, the numbers literally washed away! I wasn’t even scrubbing! WTH! Some of the lines were still there so I grabbed a towel and carefully patted the surface dry. I let it air dry while I ran in search of my paint pen from before… it wouldn’t write on the stove this time. I ran and grabbed more. Nothing would write on my stove… paper, yes… table, yes… stove, no! Crap!
I tried calling Sears and first they think the whole situation is hysterical. What did I clean it with? Dawn? Now they think I’m high… I’ve tried calling since and continuously keep getting put on hold. Ugh! I sent them an email yesterday and they suggest I buy new knobs… I did state that the numbers were not on the knobs and were on the back surface of the stove which is all one piece.
So now what? It makes it slightly difficult to cook and bake when you have little clue as to what temp the oven is at. I did manage to find a fat tipped paint pen that would write on it, but the digits are all smooshed and quite illegible. I was so hoping that Sears, the only place that carries this brand would be of assistance. Affordable assistance, I mean, I can’t afford to go out and buy a whole new stove, but I am terrified of even wiping it down at this point. Aside from the missing numbers, the stove is wonderful. It’s only a couple years old, has a beautiful ceramic cook top, and works like a dream. This just kind of sucks!

Big Boy Seats and Bad Boy Neighbors

2006-01-04T22:11:00.000-05:00

Tom got Amberielle’s old booster seat out of the attic over the weekend. I spent a great deal of yesterday soaking it in oxyclean, scrubbing it, rinsing it, scrubbing it again with oxyclean, rinsing, scrubbing it once again. Once it was all scrubbed and rinsed and disinfected and rinsed, I was still not thoroughly satisfied… it didn’t smell very “baby”. I happened to spy a 17 month old bottle of Johnson’s Baby Wash that I wasn’t able to use due to Wyatt’s eczema. I lathered it all up and once again rinsed it clean. It was squeaky clean and smelled baby fresh, so I set all the pieces aside to dry.
Tonight it was fully dry, so I decided to give the “big boy seat” a try instead of his high chair. It was missing the straps that hold him in, but the ones that strap the seat to the chair were there and fine, so I figured what the heck, I’m going to be right there anyway, right next to him. He’s usually pretty serious about his dinner anyway. He was overjoyed with his new seat. The freedom went to his head. He was banging on the table and looking all over the place. He ate very well, and I only had to tell him to sit down twice. Yay!

I’m convinced that there is something dreadfully wrong with the boys in my neighborhood. They’re morons. They’re always doing things that they should not be doing… flying garbage bags kite-style on their roof during a hurricane; squirting passing vehicles with a hose during the summer, getting water in cars, even getting a motorcycle; riding their little scooters and zip bikes in the street after dark; starting fires in their yard, playing with fireworks; playing with a wheelchair much much too close to my house, within touching distance, just so they could ride down the slope of my driveway… they only pissed me off and had me seriously contemplating chasing them from my yard with the full garbage bag that was in need of going out… throwing trash at them if necessary. Does the mother care? No… she thinks her boys are perfect and can do no wrong. We’ve called the cops before, and it just makes the mother so aggravated. She’s so blinded and they’re all just idiots. Even my five year old sees it... she is always referring to them as "the bad boys". *sigh* Every day is an adventure, and I dispise school vacations and weekends!

Happy New Year!

2006-01-03T22:54:00.000-05:00

Ahhh! It is 2006. Happy New Year friends. Tom and I just stayed home with the kids, it wasn’t bad… It could have been worse. He and a friend wanted to add LED lights to this friend’s motorcycle… a ten minute job somehow turned into a 3 hour job. Then when he came in, he was slightly shocked that I was drinking, yet didn’t make him a drink… he seemed to have forgotten that he was supposed to go to the store to buy himself some soda. Amberielle wanted more than anything to stay up and watch the ball drop, but both kids ended up falling asleep after 11pm. We woke them both up and snuggled on the couch together for the countdown. We then watched out the windows for all the fireworks that everyone was shooting off. My daughter was upset that we didn’t have any… I felt bad, but then reminded myself of the burn that she received on the fourth of July. It wasn’t Busch Gardens, but it wasn’t bad.

Lost in Translation
So my daughter wants to get my attention and says “Hey Daddy!”
Me~ What?
Her~ Oops! I got annoying there for a minute and forgot what I was supposed to say.
Me~ You got “annoying”?
Her~ Yes. I got annoying and forgot what I call you.
Me~ Do you know what annoying means?
Her~ Yes… Me!
She is a trip! And no matter what she can always make me laugh whether she means to or not.

The Perils of Furbies and Vacuuming

2005-12-29T23:24:00.000-05:00

So my MIL bought Amberielle a Furby for Christmas. The darned creature refuses to respond to any of us other than to say “No” or to snore at us. I knew there was a reason why I didn’t buy her one!
Anyway, Amberielle is in the dining room eating lunch and Wyatt is napping while I’m in the laundry room pulling clothes out of the dryer when all of a sudden from behind me I hear “You love me?” I jump and nearly slam my head into the dryer. The Furby which is in my daughter’s room has decided to talk to me. I went in to investigate what this thing had to say after days of rudeness. It decides that it wants to play a game of Red Light, Green Light. For some messed up reason that I cannot explain, I decide to play along. So its eyes are closed and I grab it and give it a tickle, so I should have won according to it’s previously stated rules. Nope, Furby decides that it wins. So, it’s a dirty cheater too.

The tree is down and I spent most of the evening vacuuming. Most of the decorations are also put away. It’s so much fun to decorate and get ready, and then the day just goes by too quickly. Then the clean up is just such a hassle. I am kind of glad that I didn’t go as all out as I usually do.

Why is it that vacuuming must be such an ordeal? Months ago, my son was terrified of the vacuum, so while engaging in the household task, I had to hold the baby, and sometimes that was not enough of a comfort… sometimes he also wanted to nurse! How fun and easy is it to vacuum with an infant attached to your breast you ask? Not very.
He’s over his fear now. You’d think I’d be jumping up and down and screaming my gratitude. No, now he’s a boy. He likes to jump in front of the vacuum while it’s running. He likes to jump in its path. He likes to try to sit on it and go for a ride while I’m trying to clean my floors. Today he even adding smacking it and yelling when it sucked up a cracker that he was apparently saving for later??? If I’d only known.

Happy Holidays!

2005-12-27T15:49:00.000-05:00

Our Christmas started out interesting enough. Tom and I have a tradition of sleeping in the living room on Christmas Eve… maybe not so much of a tradition as a lack of trust in our daughter! LOL! So we bring out all the gifts, lay out all the blankies and I grab Wyatt because I know that if he wakes up (and he will) he will freak out if we’re not in bed. We sleep with Christmas lights flashing in our faces. I think it’s a good thing that my seizures are not induced by flashing lights. Wyatt wakes every hour for water. I have to refill his cup twice. We get a violent thunderstorm, and awake to crappy dreary rain. At 8am Wyatt wakes up and I try to rub his back. I’m amazed that my daughter has slept in this long. He stands up and stumbles down the hall like a drunkard and bursts into tears when he enters my room and sees a nearly empty bed. He apparently did not realize I was with him down here. And apparently in the middle of the night Amberielle awoke and went to sleep in out bed. Her brother’s crying wakes her, she realizes she’s alone in our bed and freaks. She starts screaming, “Daddy! Mommy! Daddy! Mommy! Daddy!” Tom jumps up and starts to run down the hall, and I yell “Merry Christmas!” Suddenly my little boy is on me snuggling up to me… until he sees the mountain of loot under the tree. Amberielle comes barreling down the hall and gasps. I hand out the stockings, they get dumped and girl starts on a ripping, ooh-ing, and ahh-ing frenzy. The boy picks up a couple of the toys that were left unwrapped then drops them when he sees his popcorn popper propped up against the tree. He rushed over and suddenly the house is filled with “pop pop pop pop pop…” The morning continues... Amberielle tearing open gifts, Wyatt having no interest. The princess seems unusually disappointed in all gifts that are not Polly Pockets (which she got plenty of!). She was disappointed that the Video Now player was not a video game player… *roll eyes* Once we got all the toys out of the boxes and loaded with batteries, Wyatt was thrilled with all of his loot. My parents came over and we were ready for round two. The wrapping paper flew, and there were more Polly Pockets… fabulous little pieces! My son fell and split his chin open and there was blood everywhere.  I sat him on the couch with a cereal bar and his boo boo was forgotten. I popped my French toast in the oven and ran for the shower. Everyone ate and I had to scurry to get the stuffing and turkey ready to throw in the oven.My Dad and Tom assembled Wyatt’s Little Tikes Swirlin Sawdust Workshop and it’s an even bigger hit than the giant box that it came in! I am finally able to finish getting ready. When I am done the boy is napping so I go play Polly Pockets before I need to make a chocolate peanut butter cream pie thing and the sweet potatoes. My Aunt G and Uncle H show up followed by my Aunt D and Gram. Yay! Gram is doing great, despite having lost even more weight. She and Amberielle sit cuddled up on the couch together and watch some videos on the Video Now player. It is wonderful and magical. I could watch the two of them all day. Aunt D tells me how poor Gram just finished antibiotics because she had pneumonia. I am saddened by the deterioration of her health, and am determined to savor every moment of this holiday with her. We enter round three of the unwrapping. Everything is crazy and hectic, but I am surrounded by my family, everyone I love, and I am so happy.Gram does mention leaving once, but dinner is already on the table, so she stays and eats. We all talk and relax afterward. Amberielle plays with Gram some more. It has been a wonderful Christmas. Gram is getting tired, so she and Aunt D leave. Aunt G and Uncle H go over to my Dad’s and stepmother’s house to see it. Tom goes out to the garage to put the parts that I got him on the motorcycle. I get the kids dressed, yes, they’ve been in their pj’s up until now! And I get them ready to go to MIL’s house.We arrive and she would have been bitter about the fact that I already had a Christmas dinner at our house, but she has partied enough to assure that she won’t be in a bad mood. Her house smells like a winery.
Time for round four. By this point Wyatt has zero interest in ripping the paper, but is totally loving the 250 piece MegaBloks set that he got in addition to another set.
We eat and MIL is amazed that Tom and I clear our plates. She didn’t think we’d be hungry enough to eat two dinners. It’s getting late and the tryptophan from two turkeys is hitting me so we load up the car and head home. It has been a long day, and everyone is tired, but I didn’t want it to end. I got a lot of nice stuff… some awesome cookbooks, clothes, a new (desperately needed tea pot… thank you Amberielle and Wyatt!), candles, an adorable piggy figurine, and a gorgeous 2 stone peridot ring!  And not to be forgotten is my Garth Brooks box set from my friend Shannon!
My house looks like Geoffrey from Toys R Us puked everywhere, and my kids don’t even know what to do with themselves anymore. On the plus side, it’s a perfect excuse to get rid of yet more toys. I’ve been going through all the older toys and getting rid of stuff. So far, I have three bags of stuff to get rid of!
Oh, and to add to my holiday glee, I am sick. Icky icky nasty violent sick. It’s not at all pleasant. We tried to go have my ring resized yesterday, and after we stopped off at the Harley dealership, we had to immediately had to return home. We made a quick run to the jeweler to drop off my ring, and home for more sickness. I was up most of the night feeling miserable. These sickies are kicking me butt and I wish I could keep something, anything down! I’m just in disbelief that I am sick again! Hey, at least I was spared for the holiday!

Holiday Stress!

2005-12-22T16:13:00.000-05:00

Okay, so we had reached a solution for Christmas. We’d have my family, and more importantly, Gram, here at my house during the day. We’d have an early dinner, then after, we’d go to MIL’s house to open gifts and have another dinner. She thought we’d be going out to eat during the day. Last night she found out that I’d be cooking here and she flipped out. She actually hung up on DH. What the hell difference does it make whether we eat here or at a restaurant, we’d be eating either way? Ugh! There is no pleasing this woman, I swear!
She seems to have calmed down a bit about the whole issue now.

Well, two days ago my daughter developed weird red bumps on her face, arms and bottom. Yesterday, there were more and they were itchy. I got a little freaked out with the rapidly approaching holiday, so I called the pediatrician and they had me bring her in during lunch when no one else was around. So, I once again conquered my fears (woo hoo!) and drove my kids to the doctor. I paid the co-pay to be told that they look like bug bites, either ant(but not the typical bite pattern), flea(darned Florida sand fleas!), or mosquito(I did see one the other day… SOB had a tasty buffet with sweet Amberielle!) *shrug* I feel like a fool for not recognizing a freaking bug bite, and having to pay to learn what one looks like… how long have I been a parent? They did give us some free Benadryl and anti-itch cream and of course stickers. Maybe not $20 worth, but hey, it’s something, right?! And on a positive note, we don't have to cancel Christmas!

Today I’m feeling like a lousy mother. I was wrapping gifts, having a grand old time. I finally get to the clothes and start putting together outfits… it is then that I realize that I bought my son absolutely no shirts. He desperately needed clothes, and I bought him lots of pants, and tons of socks. I didn’t get him any cloth diapers because I knew that wouldn’t be in the budget until after the new year. I did buy him a new jacket, but no shirts! And of course I stupidly figured, “Hey! All the clothes are bought! Now I can blow all the money on toys!” Which is what I did… I was nearly unable to buy gifts for my dear husband. I’m such a dork.

Speaking of Tom, he has had tonsillitis for over a month. He was on antibiotics, but they didn’t work. Next month he goes to the ENT and they’re going to take them out. The thing is that his tonsils have always been enlarged, very enlarged. If he has them out, it will change his voice and I can’t help but wonder what my hubby will sound like.
Ooh! I wonder if it will stop the snoring and help the sleep apnea?!

I’ve been cleaning all morning and afternoon. I’ve been decorating, doing laundry, doing dishes… I need to bake cookies. I still have so much to do and am feeling guilty about just sitting here now, but there’s not much I can do while the baby naps. Okay, maybe there is, but I need a break.

Words of Amberielle

2005-12-18T00:22:00.000-05:00

We got home after running tons of errands today and I lay down on the floor in the room that is now Wyatt’s. I think I’m coming down with the flu because I have felt incredibly nauseous all day long. I announce that I do not wan to be tickled because, “I really do not feel good.” Amberielle looks at me and tells me quite certainly than “Beautiful women do not throw up, Mommy,” Good to know! LOL!

What is wrong with people?!?!

2005-12-17T13:39:00.000-05:00

I am so very annoyed today. I knew my parents were moving stuff from their storage unit into their new house today, but they never said a solitary word about actually moving out today. We get up and imagine my daughter’s horror to discover that their clothes are all packed up and so are most of their belongings. She was a basket case. I finally get her calmed down. And then they show up to move some more of their stuff out. She did not handle seeing their bed gone too well. I just wish that someone had let us know so that we could have prepared her. It’s just such a shock to her little system. They’ve been here and she’s gotten to see them every day for over 10 months now. She is so sad today and I am sad for her.
My hope was that they’d be here for Christmas at least so they could see the kids first thing Christmas morning.
Maybe they would have stayed if my stepmother wasn’t so darned determined to get her daughter and mother down here. Her mother, I don’t normally have a problem with… except for the fact that recently she has taken to acting like I was not and have not been a part of her family for the past 15 years. My stepsister... she’s another story. She’s like 25 but acts like she’s 2. She has a temper that you wouldn’t believe and is pretty helpless. It’s quite pathetic. And my stepmother enables her so badly that it makes me ill… as proven by her rush to get her down here.
I think that they are going to be in for a surprise when they do get her down here. She has already, on numerous occasions volunteered to baby-sit for any future dates/outings/whatever that Tom and I may plan. As I mentioned a few lines up she has a temper… and got fired from her job a CNA because of it. I don’t care if she has taken the anger management classes that they required for her. She won’t be allowed to watch my children.
I’m sad for my father who won’t stand up to her. The guy should be able to live in his own house with his wife… free of children; after all, we are all adults and well into out 20’s. But no, the stepmonster will have no part of that. Her children come first, as they always have. Just sad, and pathetic, it truly is.
It’s not another reason for me to want to get the heck out of this cesspool of a state. How great is that? I work for years and finally convince them to move down here, and now they’re here they have a house, or will soon, and I want nothing more than to get the hell out of here. *sigh*

Crude Little Elmo

2005-12-16T23:49:00.000-05:00

My kids have E-L-M-O. Amberielle received him as a gift last Christmas or the one before, I don’t remember. When she outgrew it or lost interest in it, Wyatt quickly embraced Elmo as his own and was once again a favorite. *sigh* He has sang and danced and entertained my children endlessly. He has also eaten more than his fair share of batteries, speaking of which, a fresh batch were placed in his foot very recently. Well, this morning my son climbs out of bed, runs down the hall and goes straight for his toy box. He brings Elmo down to my room and pushes his hand. In a deep, gravelly frightening voice that makes him sound truly possessed Elmo says, “Uh-oh” over and over again. I fight the urge to grab the billy club next to the bed and knock Elmo onto the floor and down the hall.
Once we’re all up and dressed Wyatt brings Elmo out to the living room to hang out. Fabulous! Why didn’t I turn him off and take out the batteries?! My son pushes the hand and this time Elmo says, “Uh oh” in his regular voice, followed by a noise that sounds as though he has passed gas. Elmo continues to stand on my coffee table, fart and say “Uh oh!” My children find this utterly hilarious. I must remember to remove those batteries when his gas attack is over.

This weekend is going to be crazy busy. We have to help my parents move their stuff into their new house. One step closer. I’m not too sure how I’m feeling about it. I’m kind of hoping that they stay here until after Christmas. We shall see. We also have to go grocery shopping, Tom and I need to go to the mall to finish up our shopping for each other, and I need to get my jewelry cleaned… every six months. I NEED to get the cards in the mail. I’ve had them done and sitting there for weeks. I am so bad! I need to finish wrapping the gifts; I need to make a photo album which is another gift!

Not much longer until all the holiday craziness is done and over with though. I’m slightly glad, but kind of sad.

Knock, Knock!

2005-12-09T20:28:00.000-05:00

My son’s latest favorite past time is waiting for someone to go into the bathroom or a bedroom and close the door. He then goes and knocks on the door… repeatedly. It’s hysterical when my daughter is behind the closed door because she inevitably thinks it’s me knocking. She starts yelling, “Come in!” while her brother keeps knocking and giggling. You can hear the annoyance in her voice each time she has to say “I said ‘come in’!”

I don’t know what’s wrong with my boy’s sleep patterns. Lately he’s been waking up at 1130pm voraciously hungry. We feed him, and normally even if we fed him late like that he’d just pass out. The past few nights he’s been wide awake after eating. So he and I sit on the couch, drink some milk and watch a little Leno. Last night he was having no part of the sleep thing and was still fighting it and angry at 130am. Finally I gave up and let him sprawl out all comfy on my side of the bed until he just passed out. Once I knew he was out like a light I gently transferred him to his crib. I love co-sleeping, but I was so tired and not in the mood to deal with being kicked and smacked all night long.

I must confess that I feel so guilty for constantly updating my blog. I have always enjoyed writing. The actual physical act of putting pen to paper and letting the ink flow has always been therapeutic for me. Even mundane tasks such as papers in high school and college I always wrote out prior to typing them. I currently have five journals that sit there untouched. *sigh*
Having the laptop does not help. I used to go to bed with my journals and pens and a flashlight on the nightstand, just in case I was unable to sleep and needed to get things out. Now I lie there thinking about the laptop that is on the other side of the room.

The holidays are too quickly approaching. I have so much home schooling to do with my daughter. Her favorite thing to do is, of course, arts and crafts. Luckily I have many many projects for her to do! Amberielle is currently making candy cane hearts. Fun, fun, fun!

The Joys of Parenting!

2005-12-07T23:26:00.000-05:00

My silly little lady…
We’re sitting at the table eating dinner the other night and my daughter is telling all three knock knock jokes that she knows. She then proceeds to make up her own that make us raise our eyebrows and say, “What???” My husband suddenly announces “Oh! I have a joke!” And he tells his own joke that makes us raise our eyebrows and say, “What???” My daughter looks at him and says, “That’s your joke???” LOL!

My son’s newest trick…
Today I was getting lunch ready and I took the tray out of his high chair, which incidentally is on the highest setting. While my back is turned the little monkey child climbs into his high chair ALL BY HIMSELF! I turn to see him sitting there clapping for himself because he is so proud of his new trick! He proceeded to do it again at dinner time. This boy will give me a heart attack one of these days. Mark my words!

Our tree is thus far safe. The boy has touched it only a couple times, each time he looks at his hands like he’s gotten something repulsive on them and wipes his them off feverishly. Once he tried to touch the tree and I coincidentally pinched my finger at that moment and yelped “Ouch!” I think that was another convincer that the three is definitely an ouchie thing to be feared. He did get excited upon seeing decorations on it, but we only decorated the top half, so he can’t reach anything. The lights aren’t as much as a draw as I thought they’d be. So far so good!

Nightmares

2005-12-05T16:09:00.000-05:00

I hate those dreams that are so frighteningly real. I had a few that are scaring me beyond anything imaginable. The details are eerily vivid.
I saw something in my dream that I later saw after waking... A man selling papers on the street, okay, not that that is highly unusual, but he was the man in my dreams, and just as in my dream he was clutching two newspapers, both the Tampa Tribune.
As I said they frighten me, and one sickens me to even think about it.
I’m afraid to put them in writing for fear that they will come true.
They both involved the loss of two loved ones who are very dear to my heart.
*sigh*

I'm Surrounded By Nuts I Tell You!

2005-12-04T23:37:00.000-05:00

My father is a nut because he is convinced that I am pregnant. He keeps remarking to my husband and myself how much more I am eating lately… nope, not pregnant, I’m just a pig… the little bit of weight that I have put on… nope, not pregnant, just getting chubby. He seems to think that I’m having weird cravings, but is a mushroom cheese burger that weird? I honestly didn’t think it was. He should have been here for the peanut butter and pickle sandwich cravings I had when I was pregnant with my daughter. I’m almost afraid to mention that I now feel nauseous from eating too much when we all went out to dinner. He’d definitely read too much into that. I am so not pregnant… not that I wouldn’t like to be! LOL!
My husband is a nut for many reasons but it’s all a part of why I love him so. I have without a doubt become a Harley widow. He’s always on the look out for what he’s going to chrome out next. Hey, at least it helps with Christmas shopping. I feel like I’m buying gifts for “the other woman” LOL!
My son is a nut whose latest habit is grabbing my leg and screeching whenever I get up. He’s so clingy lately. He’s lucky he’s so darned cute. He’s talking a lot more. He’s saying mama, dada, Daddy, his sisters name, hi daya (hi there), hello, cracka (cracker), wuv oo (love you), day chee (say cheese), all dun (all done), all don (all gone), yesh (yes), uh oh!, stinky, ticky ticky (tickle tickle), and there are more that I know I’m not thinking of right now… it’s late and I’m tired.
My daughter is a nut who is just a major diva! She won’t share, she won’t listen, she’s sometimes so mean to her baby brother. *sigh* I hope this phase passes quickly. There are times when she doesn’t even seem to care that Santa is watching her. Sometimes she such an angel, and others… ugh!
On to less nutty happenings…We got our tree today. It is a gorgeous 9’ balsam. It is so full and beautiful! My princess was upset because she wanted to pick out the tree all by herself, but her tastes were more Charlie Brown. She’s not complaining anymore though and cannot wait for it to drop so she can decorate it!
Now the season of obsessive compulsive vacuuming begins! Joy!

Santa, Sleep Troubles, and Other Stuff...

2005-12-02T23:40:00.000-05:00

I forgot to post about our visit to Santa, which actually occurred weeks ago. I spent quite a bit of time brushing and putting my daughter’s hair up, which is more struggle than it should be, got her dressed into a pretty dress, then fought my son into a pair of nice pants and a shirt. My husband nixed the Mohawk and because photos are involved, I conceded.
We went up to the mall and thankfully there was only one family in front of us, and their kids freaked out at the sight of the jolly old fat guy so they left. My sweet angel runs up and sits in his lap… photo… I walk up and place the baby in his arms and step back. My son looks at me, his eyes filled with disbelief and betrayal. He has the largest sense of stranger anxiety of any child that I have ever encountered. I know that he is completely dumbfounded as to why his ever-trusted mommy put him willing into the lap of this oddly dressed old dude. I stand nearby and try reassuring him, smiling, laughing, peek-a-booing and the lower lip comes out. Quick photo (He’s sad and she’s not even looking at the camera!) Pull my daughter off Santa’s lap for a quick solo shot before he realizes that his sister has left and he loses it.
I swoop in and scoop him up and try to calm the tears while my little girl goes to tell St Nick what she wants… “I want a LOT of stuff… oh yeah, and so does my brother… that’s all.” *roll eyes*

We’re getting a little sick of the grief from all the uber pc yahoos that my husband works with. He’s thinking of a career change. A friend of ours told us about an opening at his place. It could be an excellent thing potentially. The kicker is, if he stays with his current company for a few more months, then he’ll get a large bonus. I don’t know what we’re going to do yet.

We got even more shopping done today. Stocking stuffers are done and out of the way. Now the only things left are the gifts for DH and myself. Woo hoo! Now if I only knew what to get my husband! I swear he is the most difficult person to shop for that I have ever encountered.

I think we may have experienced a night terror last night. I went to bed and my little man was still in his crib next to the bed. So I curl up and drift off to sleep and he wakes up screaming. At first I think he’s had a bad dream, so I lean over and rub his back and try to comfort him while he still lies in the crib on his tummy. Then he tries to get up, but he can’t. I realize that he’s lying on his arm, so I think maybe his arm is completely asleep. I scoop him up and snuggle with him while rubbing his arm. He still screams, but this isn’t a pain cry. I try offering the breast and for the first time in his life he refuses it. I try comforting him some more, but nothing is working. He’s just hysterical. I check him and everything seems to be fine. He’s dry, I can find nothing that is hurting him. I switch him and try to offer the other breast, and he just gets even angrier and much louder. After about 15-20 minutes he finally calms down slightly and I nurse him to sleep. He sleeps soundly until morning. *shrug*
I have no idea what that was all about. Hopefully tonight is better!

Rambling...

2005-12-02T00:03:00.000-05:00

So we went shopping today and bought the kids a bunch of clothes for Christmas. We got them both jackets, so that’s covered, thank goodness. I found a sweet deal on footie pajamas at The Children’s Place for the little man. I’m half wishing I’d gotten him more! For the girl we got fuzzy sweaters and sparkly jeans. And of course I’m thankful for Old Navy Fleece for them both! I just have a few more things to pick up for them both… and of course I’m still thinking about those footie pj’s!

I’m still at a loss as to what to get my husband. He wants stuff for his motorcycle and needs clothes for work, but those seem so impersonal. I get him a clock or watch every year, so that’s just too predictable. I just do not know!

Speaking of my hubby, he had to leave work early on Tuesday because his throat was really sore. His tonsils were frighteningly swollen and covered in white patchy sores! Thankfully he was off Wednesday, so he went to the doctor and he has a severe infection in his tonsils. He’s on antibiotics, so we’re hoping that he doesn’t have to have his tonsils out. He’s home for the rest of the week.
I am just thankful that he’s not one of “those guys”. You know the ones… they become completely helpless whiny babies when they’re sick. I guess I got lucky! Either that or he knows that I wouldn’t tolerate it! LOL!

The weather here is deliciously cold! We had a high of 61 degrees today, and I was thoroughly enjoying it! This is the weather that I love, but I know that it won’t last. *sigh* I miss the cold weather and the snow. I miss New England. Attitash opened last week… what I wouldn’t give to go skiing. *sigh*

Bah Humbug!

2005-11-30T21:50:00.000-05:00

Well, the fun begins. Every single year my MIL insists on having Christmas at her house. There are no if’s and’s or but’s about it. As I may have previously mentioned, my grandmother does not do well with people as you could guess by her attempts to leave here on Thanksgiving. Well, due to her comfort level, and not wanting to go to my MIL’s house, every single year I celebrate “Christmas” with my family on random day… sometimes not until after the new year, and last year I didn’t get to see my grandmother until after Mother’s Day… The one year we did try to have Gram at MIL’s house she was ready to leave 10 minutes after arriving… and did. It’s just never a really happy experience for me.
Of course, this year is the same. She’s already saying she REALLY wants Christmas at her house… like I have any say in the matter. Nothing I say seems to matter. My Gram is 92 years old, and as I previously mentioned, she is not doing well. This very well could be her last Christmas, and I will not get to spend it with her. *sigh*
It’s just so freaking depressing and really makes me want to forget about the whole holiday!

Happy Holidays!

2005-11-29T17:13:00.000-05:00

Well, it’s official, my parents are moving out soon. They are currently cleaning the house and waiting for a date on the closing. Coincidentally, the house that they will be buying is the house that we used to own. It was bizarre being back in there. It was so familiar and so foreign at the same time. My Dad asked where my sweet little girl took her first steps and I was flooded with so many memories of milestones. I can point out that, where she rolled over for the first time, where she ate solids for the first time, even where she was conceived.
It was great to see the old neighbors. They were always so friendly… that is one thing that I miss.

Thanksgiving went okay. My Grandmother isn’t doing well at all. She looked so frail and could not remember any of us, which was so heartbreaking for me. She tried to go sit out in the car because she didn’t want to be with strangers, and tried to leave right before dinner. Thankfully my husband talked her into staying both times. She did well after eating, and ate surprisingly well. She is currently down to 80 lbs and I am so scared for her.

We are just about done with all of our holiday shopping! We only need to purchase stocking stuffers, gifts for each other, and we are done. Oh, and the kids clothes… do those really count as gifts though? I have a feeling that between now and then, I’ll see things that are just too cute to resist. It’s okay though, last week I went through all the toys that they kids own and did some serious purging. I got rid of more than three large garbage bags full of toys! Sadly, I think I’m in the mood to get rid of more! Oh my kids will love me! LOL!
We also need to decide when we’re going to go and get our tree. Maybe we’ll get it over the weekend. I want to get it as soon as possible. That will help really make it feel like the holidays, but I am so not looking forward to the battle of the pine needles. I’ll have to be armed with my vacuum during all waking hours to prevent finding pine needle poops in my sons diapers. Ick! Not to mention the fact that I am terrified about my sweet, yet slightly(?) rambunctious 16 month old son. I know that he’ll pull ornaments off. I know that he’ll try to climb it, after all he is a climber by nature. I know that he’ll try to pull it down on top of himself.
I don’t even know where we’re going to put said tree. We always put it in the front window. That spot is partially occupied by a toy box, and is almost always guarded by my son who loves to stare outside and watch the neighborhood happenings. Not that we live in an exciting area…
I need to convince my husband to go into the attic and bring down the decorations so we can get a move on. I also need him to bring down the wrapping paper if I have any up there. If any of it is salvageable. I have a bad habit of saving the littlest bits of paper, because you never know when you’ll have a tiny gift that needs a tiny bit of paper. I’m a tad neurotic sometimes. I need to get the gifts wrapped so they aren’t in see through bags. They are hidden in my closet, but I fear my five year old will wander in looking for something and see Polly Pocket peeking out from behind a blanket behind my door… either that or she’ll be outright nosey and will uncover the Toys R Us that is hidden in my closet.

HP and Fluffy mail!

2005-11-18T18:27:00.000-05:00

I think that today I am about as tired as I've ever been. I'm tired and having a weird eye twitch. It's annoying the heck out of me. Grrrr!
Emotionally today hasn't been too bad of a day. Some days are good and some days are bad... ah well, as is life.
Well, tonight my hubby and I have a hot date. It's me, him and Harry Potter! Woo hoo! I am so excited. My little girl wants to go see it too, but I think we'll have to screen it first, then maybe we'll take her to see it.
Today was a fluffy day! We got 2 new LHC diapers, some wipes, a soap sample, and note for 20% off my next order! I love fluffy mail! My next order will hopefully be soon! I love her dipes! They're already in the wash so they can join the rotation as soon as possible. *giggle*
I have another friend who is newly pregnant! I really can't handle this! My baby fever is getting so rediculously bad! At least seven of my friends are currently pregnant! Yikes! My uterus is flipping out!
Well, I have much to do today... laundry, dishes, figuring out something for dinner, floors, etc... So I'm going to run for now! Ciao!

Just Blah...

2005-11-16T01:21:00.000-05:00

Oh how I hate this time of year. Don't get me wrong, I love the holidays, I just harbor so many painful memories. With the approach of the anniversary of my Mom's passing, things are just so hard right now, not to mention all the other issues that I'm currently trying to deal with.Both my babies are sick, nobody is sleeping, and I am throughly exhausted. Ugh!
I haven't has a neurofeedback session in what seems like forever. My last appointment I went in and she had an emergency and was out for "a couple minutes". For some messed up reason the tech wasn't there either, so we couldn't even just start without her. A half an hour after my appointment was supposed to start, I'd had enough. Even if she'd shown up, I wouldn't have gotten a full session, it would have been cut short, or rushed so we left. The messed up thing is if I was a no show, then I'd still have to pay for the session... I think I should get some sort of reimbursement for my time!Now she is on vacation, so no sessions are currently scheduled.
Having a car here during the day has been fabulous. The freedom to go where I want when I want... unfortunately as previously mentioned, the kids are still sick, so we are still stuck at home.Speaking of them being sick, little man has a pediatrician appointment tomorrow. Of course since he's been sick he hasn't been eating as much. I shudder to think of what his weight will be. She was concerned at the last visit about his lack of weight gain... I hate to even think about tomorrow. And of course with him being sick, he won't be getting his shots, which means I will have to take them in by myself! Dear Hubby has always gotten the days off for all ped appointments(including tomorrow) to help with the shots and hold the kids while I silently cry in the corner. I really dread having to take him in for his shots without DH!
Oh, my dishwasher died this evening. How wonderful is that! I have no idea when we'll be able to get this one fixed, or get a new one. *sigh* It's the icing on the cake I tell you.

Motorcycles and Cabbage Patch Kids

2005-11-11T16:26:00.000-05:00

Well, on Wednesday my husband went out to meet up with a friend and came home with a Harley. Yeah, we are the new owners of a Harley. He is over the moon. Now we need to get rid of the 2 motorcycles that we already have. Well, now he can take the bike to work, and I'll have the car here during the day to use as I please. Of course, I have the car, and both kids are sick, so I'm still stuck here in the house... Go figure!
My Cabbage Patch Kid family is complete (for the moment!) I finally found one that shares my birthdate. So now I have Mine, DH's and both kids! Woo hoo! The other three were so easy to find, and were all found within 2 months of each other. Mine proved to be quite elusive. It was a nationwide search, as I had friends all over the country looking for me also. Everytime I went into a store, I took every single doll off the shelf to check it's birthdate. It was obsessive, maddening and I was unstoppable. I was so thrilled to find MY doll after all these years. Yes, this search has gone on for years! Now I don't know what to do. I need a new obsession.
I have got so much to do... so much laundry, so much cleaning, I have to do the floors, dishes, etc... it never ends.
One week! One week! One week until Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire comes out! Woo hoo! DH and I have a date. DD has been asking to go, but I'm not too sure. We'll see.

Happy Birthday Sweet Baby!

2005-10-28T22:05:00.000-04:00

Well, my dear friend had her baby. A beautiful sweet little boy!
Happy Birthday and welcome to the world sweet baby R!
It was an easy labor and Momma had no pain! :)
Congratulations to her and her entire family!

Anticipation...

2005-10-28T19:59:00.000-04:00

I sit here waiting for the phone to ring. My friend is having her baby today! She called earlier as she was on her way to the hospital, so now I just wait for the arrival of this little one. Waiting, waiting, waiting! The anticipation is driving me nuts! I'm so antsy and I don't quite know what to do with myself! Soon! The baby will be here soon! I just can't believe that I'll be doing this again with another friend in 6 weeks!
I have a bit of a bone to pick with my husband. I love the man dearly, but I need to teach him that the laundry room is not a lay-over point for all things who's final destination is the garage. I keep bringing screw drivers and such out there for him, but I think this will come to an end. Today I was attempting to do laundry and in order to clean the lint trap I had to move power tools, giant clippers, hammers, and other garage related items. Grrrrr....Come to think of it I must have the same discussion with my daughter. I also had to move a teddy bear and various story books. *sigh* Like father, like daughter, I guess.
I have such an adorable laundry helper today. He's not very efficient, but he's cute! I pulled a load of cloth diapers and wipes from the dryer and put them on the couch so I could fold them after I finished putting clothes from the washer into the dryer. I turn and my boy comes barrelling down the hall with a wipe on his head, laughing like a madman. Now he won't let me fold anything, he insists on trying every diaper on his head first. Many times he's gone running with a diaper over his head(and face) only to crash into a wall or table. What a nut!He's also grabbing all the clean folded diapers and running. He's trying to put them into the dirty diaper pail! Maybe this is why I have an obscene amount of diaper laundry every single day!
Okay, I'm off to bite my nails and wait for the phone to ring some more! Ack! I can't take this!

Fresh Ink!

2005-10-26T01:16:00.000-04:00

Woo hoo! I got a brand new tat on Sunday night! It's a two large stars surrounded by swirlies and smaller stars with both kids names above each large star. It's very cool. I'm happy with the way that it came out. It is however the largest tattoo that I have, and I was in the chair for over 2 hours, so I wasn't too happy by freaking midnight! Not to mention the fact that I was questioning what possessed me to give my daughter a name that consists of 10 letters! Man oh man!
We went back to homeschooling today after taking a break for about a week... maybe more. Man oh man! I think that was a mistake because the student refused to listen to the teacher. It took her hours to do 2 worksheets! Yikes! She kept claiming to have forgotten how to count and how to write numbers and letters. Oy! I had such a headache by the time that we were done!
A good friend of mine is having a baby any day now. I'm praying for a fast and easy labor and delivery for her and I for one cannot wait for the mystery to end... Although I'm thinking pink! I'm clutching my phone and eagerly awaiting that call! I am just so excited! I love you Sista!Now we have to pray that the battery in my cell doesn't die. It's had a very bad habit of doing that lately. I was at Toys R Us over the weekend praying that she didn't go into labor because of my stupid phone! LOL!
We have been doing some mattress shopping! Woo hoo! We may finally be getting rid of the waterbed! It only took me sleeping on the floor through 2 pregnancies and complaining for 6 years! LOL!
The lenses came in for my glasses again, so tomorrow I go back in. Let's see if they can do them without scratching them this time. Third time's a charm right? I'm keeping my fingers crossed that soon I'll be able to see again!
The little dude is quite miserable. He's getting 7 teeth. He was at a point where he was waking every 30 minutes to an hour. I just couldn't function after about 4 nights of that! Last night we gave him a dose of motrin and he slept through the night! I was a happy mommy upon waking this morning!

Neurofeedback Session #3 and other ramblings...

2005-10-21T00:36:00.000-04:00

Well, yesterday I had session number 3. I almost left 15 minutes into it because the stupid computer kept shutting itself down. I had a really hard time getting started, and once I got my groove on... blank screen. Restart... finally get things going again and the darn machine would shut down again! Finally they hooked up both sides of my head and ran it as a 2 channel and everything was fine. Well, except for the goo all over my hair. I felt I was doing well, and they did too because it was decided that they needed to make it more difficult. Joy! I left there very tired, and with a headache.Have I noticed any changes? Maybe, but I'm not sure. I don't have any sessions at all next week, so hopefully that won't be a setback for me... I don't think it will be.
I have been conquering a great fear of mine... driving. I took my very first solo trip yesterday when I had to take my 5 year old to karate. I was having panic attacks and was terrified. I was literally getting sick before we left, but driving down the road alone with my little cheerleader felt surprisingly normal. My little girl sat in the backseat and she kept telling me that I was doing great and she was proud of me. <3 What a sweetheart she is.
Karate was fun. She hurt one of her classmates (not that that was the fun part)! He was a boy who was bigger than her, and she, with a tone of authority announced to everyone that she can't help it because she's "a very strong girl!" And she makes a muscle as proof. From such a tiny girl with a sweet voice, she had the entire room in hysterics.
The boy is such a momma's boy. I love it, but it seems that I cannot get anything done. He's getting 6 teeth... 2 eye teeth, and 4 molars(!) so he just wants to be held at all times, and sometimes the sling is not good enough! All he wants to do all the time is be held and nurse. He is such a lovey-bug though! He is always giving me kissies and saying "Wuv-oo" <3 That makes up for all the teething crankies! And comes close to making up for the sleepless nights! LOL!
The lenses for my glasses finally came in, and they scratched them AGAIN! As a consolation for me not having glasses for a month, they took $20 off the price of the antiglare coating. Woo- freaking- hoo!

Neurofeedback Session #2

2005-10-15T03:01:00.000-04:00

Wednesday I went in for Neurofeedback session number two. It was... interesting. We started with temperature gauging. It was so funny how my temperature was going up, then when I told her that I was concerned that I would inadvertedly cause myself to have a seizure, my temp plummeted.
I got hooked up to the computer, and we got started. First I had to watch a groovy pic and try to make it change colors. It was start and stop, start and stop. I had no clue what the heck I was doing. The second training exercise was a maze. I had those little dots flying through the maze. I felt like an ace and the tech was so impressed with exercises one and two. My only set back was when I heard my daughter cry out in pain. My mother in law was sick and unable to watch the kids, so they were in the waiting room. My dots actually went backwards, but after a few seconds they started flying again. The third excersize was a sunrise. It sounds nice, huh? All I had to do was make the sunrise... I couldn't concentrate anymore. My mind was wandering all over the place. I kept thinking of a very pregnant friend, of my kids, motorcycles, everything and anything. I had a more difficult time getting the sun to rise than I had with the first training excersize. Ugh! It was so hard, and I was so happy to be done with it. It was such a long hour and I was exhausted afterwards. I have to be completely honest and say that I am skeptical. Part of me kept wondering if I was actually controlling the images on the computer screen, or if it was a program on the computer that randomly did things.So far, I have not noticed any improved mental clarity or function... not that I should be noticing anything after only one training session.
I was supposed to have another training session on Thursday, but with no one to watch the kids I had to cancel, and I'm not all that upset by it.

If it weren't for bad luck...

2005-10-07T01:16:00.000-04:00

I'd have no luck at all... I'm telling you... I just cannot catch a break! It's insane I tell you.
Two days ago...
I went to pick up my new glasses and after we left the place, I thought everything looked smudgy, I took off my glasses and saw what looked like fingerprints on the lenses, right in the center of each. I started to clean them, and discover that they are not dirty... they have swirly scratches. Back to the store and now I have to wait ANOTHER 1-2 weeks. Darn polycarbonate lenses...
I broke my toe while trying to clear the table. I was trying to squeeze between the table and the high chair that contained my sleeping son, and smashed the little piggy that went wee wee wee all the way home all the way to the back of my foot. I nearly went wee wee wee myself.
Yesterday...
I went to my Neurofeedback session. The only thing that we accomplished was having them draw on my scalp and face with various colored markers. I'm a living connect the dots for crying out loud. Joy! I've showered numerous times and scrubbed my scalp raw and I still have rainbow polka dots hidden in my hair.At the session, they kept losing the darn dots because I have so much freaking black hair! Fun!Also I've come to realize that I'm terrified that in learning to train my brainwaves, I'll inadvertently cause myself to have a seizure. It's just frightening. Fingers crossed that that doesn't happen... just keep thinking about the benefits. All the benefits.
We get home and hire a guy to trim up the palms in the back. They're like 40-50 feet tall. I'm paranoid that he's going to fall. Luckily he doesn't, but he does disturb the squirrel family that resides in one of the trees and a squirrel ends up going for a dip in our pool. Ick! I hate Florida!
Joy! Did I mention that both kids and hubby are sick and miserable.
Karate had been canceled, so I have a pouty miserable daughter.
I have a boy who is a boy... he climbs on a table and falls... I didn't quite make it to him in time, so he now has a nice bruise! He decided to play with a spongebob director-style chair which folded up on him and trapped him. He wasn't hurt, just seriously ticked off. Attack of the spongebob bear trap.He grabbed his sister's water cup off the table and being the curious fellow he is, tipped it. The full cup of water poured down over his head, face and belly. He was not a happy camper that the mean cup also attacked.
Today...
More BS from DH's job. He was supposed to get a raise, and now no one seems to remember, he'll get one in a few months. I'm ready for him to be done with them. I wish I had the balls to tell him to just go OTR. I wish the thought didn't scare the crap out of me, but it does. I'm trying to deal and get over it. If worst comes to worst then that's what he'll do. I cannot tolerate him being somewhere where he's so unhappy and the people cannot respect him.
Oh and my day started out with a visit from a crazy psycho sitting across the street watching my house. I shouldn't let it get to me because that's what he wants. I just cannot stand feeling like I'm being watched while I'm in the privacy of my home. I don't think he'd do anything, but the thought of him seeing me makes my skin crawl. The thought of him seeing my children makes me nauseous.
Ahhh... more reasons for me to hate Florida!
Okay. I'm done. Rant over. Let's hope that things start getting better. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Huge Sigh of Relief

2005-09-17T03:20:00.000-04:00

The boy's surgery went very well. Well, aside from not being able to feed him, and I must tell you that considering that I am still nursing, it made for a very difficult morning. We were lucky enough to get a relatively early surgery though. He was fully and wonderfully alert afterwards when he was returned to his room and to us. As soon as he saw me he was trying to roll over and get up... his jelly legs made that nearly impossible though. The staff at the hospital was absolutely wonderful, and there is absolutely nowhere else that I would have rather had my son be for his surgery.We got home and he and I took a nice long nap together. We went to pick up his Sissy and when we came home the two of them were running around playing despite my gentle reminders to be careful for Pete's sake! We went out to eat and he totally chowed down and screamed at Daddy for a milk shake. He is without a doubt back to his normal self... being a boy, rough housing, climbing, standing on tables, being a maniac. Every day I have to remind his sister to be careful and to watch out for the "boo boo area". He has been such a crazy nursing fiend! I think he's still ticked off and scared that he'll get denied again! LOL! My little trooper hasn't even really needed any of his pain meds!I am so glad that it's over. It went so much better than I could have imagined. I just want to thank everyone for all your thoughts, prayers and well wishes. They have meant so very much to us all. (((HUGS))) Cyber cookies to you all!

Nail biting and other stress relievers

2005-09-12T01:29:00.000-04:00

My baby's surgery is only days away and I'm not going to lie, I'm starting to get very nervous. Granted I want to get this problem taken care of and this problem is scaring the heck out of me, I'm just having panic attacks over the surgery. He's my baby! He's still so tiny! There are always complications with surgery! Oy! *deep breath in* He'll be okay. He's a tough little man. And this problem needs to be taken care of. Only a couple more days. Everything will be fine... right? Yeah.Right about now I wish I still smoked... no, not really, but I need some way to get rid of this stress and nervous energy!

What a waste...

2005-09-08T17:16:00.000-04:00

So DH and I bought our daughter a very nice, slightly expensive bed tent for her birthday. I won't lie, it was somewhat of a bribe to get her to sleep in her own bed... rather than ours. I don't mind co-sleeping with her for the occasional nightmare or scary night, but she is a bed-hog so co-sleeping every single night is getting to be a bit rediculous, especially because since we have a California King bed! We set up her bed tent last night and she was so excited. She played in it and yelled how it was what she always wanted! I started thinking "Yay! Maybe tonight we'll have the bed to ourselves, or at the very least ourselves plus Little Man!"Bed time! She happily goes in and zips herself in. She smiles and waves to us through the little windows. We leave. One hour later she comes out of her room saying she's thirsty and she goes and gets herself a glass of water. On her way back to her room she tells her Daddy that she wants him to sleep in her tent with her, he says maybe over the weekend. She goes in and closes her door. Half hour later we hear her crying so I go in. She says she's squished in there. I open and tie back the flaps for her. She says that's better because it stinks in there. *shrug* She still looks unhappy, so I sit with her and tell her how cool her bed tent is. I tell her about the one I had as a kid and how much I loved it. She is intrigued. Daddy comes in and also tells her how cool it is. We tell her how much we wish they made them big enough for our bed. We joke that maybe we'll get 2 small beds and we'll each get our own tent! She seems more at ease so I post her puppy in the pocket of the tent. He can be her guard dog. I leave.I just sit down on the couch when I am called back. They have requested a nightlight. She hasn't slept with a nightlight in years, but I go and find one. I plug it in and she agrees that it's much better. I again leave. At this point it's 1230 am! I am so tired and want to go to sleep already. DH emerges and we sit on the couch and wait for her to go to sleep. Finally we go to bed. As we do every single night we open her door. She's still awake so Daddy goes in. I get ready for bed and lie down. Hubby comes into the room, closely followed by... guess who!She sleeps on our floor, so at least she's not hogging up the bed.She says she'll sleep in it tonight, we'll see if she will, or if this was a waste of money.

Momma's are NOT supposed to get sick!

2005-09-06T19:25:00.000-04:00

Momma's are not supposed to get sick. On top of feeling like poo, I have to plan a birthday party for a certain soon to be 5 year old, do a mountain of laundry, care for my 2 little sickos, get together the donations for the hurricane victims, and so much more.
Yep, a certain little lady that I know is turning five! What a big girl! I'm not sure what we're getting her yet, I don't even know when we're having the party. I do know that it will be Strawberry Shortcake. And I do know how many days are left... she reminds me daily. Now I need my head to clear so that I can think and plan! Ugh!
Life has been so fun around here. DH, both kids and I have been so miserable. It's been fun, trying to get everyone medicine all at once, trying to pump everyone full of juice, and chicken soup, wipe snotty noses... does a Mommy ever get to rest... no. No, I really can't say that. DH did let me sleep in and catch a couple naps. He's such a sweet fellow. It would have been better had I not had one child coming in and asking me questions and the other just hitting and tickling me.
My heart goes out to all the victims of Hurricane Katrina. My heart aches for all those babies. I continuously think about how last year, I had a newborn and living in Florida, that could have happened to us. I have to clean out my closet because I have packages and packages of diapers, newborn dipes that my boy outgrew and larger sizes, plus pull up from before my girl was potty learned. Since we're now in cloth diapers I have no reason to hold onto them, so I'm going to donate them. I also have some formula that we obviously don't need. And I'm sure I can find some clothes and blankets and such...
Now if only I didn't get winded just walking down the hall! Heck, I'm lying here listening to cheesy 80's music because the remote is on the coffee table and I cannot bribe one of my children to give it to me! LOL!

Sleepless in Central Florida

2005-08-27T03:31:00.000-04:00

*yawn* So sleepy and I'm not too sure why I'm not asleep yet...
Well after a lengthy game of phone tag we finally got more information for my little Prince's surgery... but not a time! We won't find out when it will be until the day before... fabulous. I hope we get a nice early appointment, first one would be nice. I just want this done already!
My sweet hubby and I had a nice anniversary. Part one was today~ flowers, cards, gifts, dinner with kids and family. Part two, the us time is to be continued! He is such a wonderful man, and every single day I am grateful for the gift of his love.

The Waiting Game

2005-08-25T17:18:00.000-04:00

Well, we still haven't found out when Little Man's surgery is. What is up with that? I'm sick of worrying about things. I just want this all to be behind us already!! I mean, every time he cries, I can't help but wonder if it's because he's in pain from his new tooth, or if it's something else. It's just so darned aggravating! Hopefully we hear something soon!!
It has been such a freaking bad day! I was getting ready to make the kids lunch when the power goes out. Fabulous. I can't cook a blessed thing, and of course no one wants sandwiches! And dinner is in the crockpot! Ack! Oh! And I had a load of diapers in the wash. Great! I made numerous calls to the power company... becoming more and more irate with each call. I saw numerour trucks from the power company drive by, stop in front of my house, and then continue on their way. The little Diva is whining that the TV will never work again... glad to see where her priorities lie! I finally resigned myself to the fact that the kids would be eating cookies and crackers, we'd be spending the afternoon trying to nap, and if it got too unbearably hot in the house, then we'd have to brave the heat and all go jump in the pool.
On to brighter topics...
Our anniversary is coming up! Woo hoo! Not too sure what the man has planned for us yet, but I'm sure it will be wonderful!
And in less than 2 weeks The Princess will turn 5! Where the heck did the time go there? Wasn't she just a newborn... or at least a toddler? My Goodness!

Where the heck has the year gone?

2005-08-09T18:53:00.000-04:00

A year ago today I was trying to nap after a busy day of labor and childbirth. I was eagerly awaiting the arrival of my daughter. I was anxious about her reaction to her brand new baby brother. Thankfully it was love at first sight. She was so amazed by this tiny human who was smaller than some of her baby dolls. She held him and kissed him and professed her love to him.A year later she holds him against his will, runs from him when he drools(apparently baby drool is toxic) and calls him a monster when he takes her toys, but gladly plays with his for him.A year later he follows her everywhere she goes, tries to give her drool-y kisses, and bangs on the bathroom door while she is in there to assure himself that she has not fallen into the "icky! no potty" as it is called.
I am amazed by all that has happened this past year. My baby is growing into this boy. My living room is littered with trucks, trucks and more trucks... and a pink Barbie Jeep! I have witnessed so much from the boy I was unsure if I would ever hold. My miracle boy is a walking talking noise-loving boy. He has slightly more hair than he did a year ago, but I look at him and I can still see the tiny newborn that he was then.
His Elmo party was a success. He greeted guests at the door, before running and hiding. He got many nice boy toys. But I did learn a few things(I can't believe this is my second child!) firstly, one giant Elmo face cake for an almost one year old is overkill. He hardly touched it. Maybe he was just being polite for company. He ate some frosting and nibbled on Elmo's chin, then cried to be cleaned up. My second lesson was that that much red frosting is not a good thing. It mixed with drool and his soy milk and looked like blood dripping off him. Not to mention the fact that it stained the poor boy!
Today has been pretty uneventful. We've played blocks and trucks. We've played with the Elmo balloon. Elmo has without a doubt seen better days... not helped by the fact that little dude sent Elmo sailing into the ceiling fan. Poor Elmo. Tonight we'll have cupcakes... maybe without frosting!
Happy First Birthday Buddy! You are so loved!

Boys!

2005-08-02T19:25:00.000-04:00

My little man is growning up so fast. I'm in disbelief that he's going to be one. It feels like we JUST brought him home from the hospital. Now I'm watching him walk around the house chasing his sister. Then~ she was so in awe of her baby brother that when she went to kiss him and he spit up, yes she jumped back and said "ewww..." but she still gave him a kiss.Now~ She's constantly trying to get her toys away from him before he contaminates them with baby drool... the most foul substance know to her.
I'm not even too sure what to do about the diaper situation, short of duct tape... we can't use dipes with aplix anymore, and now he's figured out the snaps. He's taken off his diaper and peed in my laundry basket... those clothes were clean by the way! And yesterday took it off and pooped on my rug! I've tried rushing him down and sitting him on the potty, and he did poop once. For the most part though, the potty scared him unless he's allowed to splash around in it! Icky!
Oh the plus side the little guy slept straight through the night (woo hoo!) in his crib (double woo hoo!)!
Tom started his new schedule. Yay to the 4 day work week, but boo to his 10 hour days!

My Little Mountain Climber

2005-08-01T01:06:00.000-04:00

Why does little dude feel the need to climb everything? How many times today have a pulled him off the table, off the couch, or caught him just before he does a dives off the back of the couch? Too freaking many. Each time, my heart stops and I end up running towards him screaming like a mad-woman, "Cookie! If you get down now I will give you a cookie!" How perfect, he just brought me the package of cookies and toddled over to the chair and hoisted his leg up. He knows the drill...