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I was finding it a bit of a hassle to keep up with both blogs. Since I paid for LJ that'll be my primary one. Be sure to check it out!

Weekend Update...

Today was a relaxing day. We didn’t do much. We did drop the kids off with MIL so that we could go for a ride on the Harley. My back was hurting, and the ride was a bit of a disappointment.
Amberielle had fun and she got to play with some of the kids in MIL’s neighborhood. They were definitely NOT a good influence on my daughter… we got home and she called her father “stupid”. This is not something that we tolerate in my house. Certain words are a major no-no, not just for kids, but also for adults… that is one of them. I know that she picked it up from one of those kids because when we got there, she ran to me and told me that the boy in the green shirt called her stupid and made her sad.
Then later she started talking about sex… or more specifically, people having sex. Fabulous! She’s five years old! Tom thinks it’s about time for me to have “the talk” with her, but I am so not ready for this. I don’t know who to handle it!
And her not hanging out with the kids is a MIL battle that I’m not willing to fight right now!
Well yesterday was quite a day. Wyatt has been climbing out of his crib for many months now. Thankfully he has always hurled himself out bedside. After much consideration, we came to realize that it’s only a matter of time before he goes other-side… we’ve had a few close calls, so yesterday Tom went up into the attic and brought down Amberielle’s old toddler bed. I scrubbed it down numerous times… as I did with the booster seat… I did this outside even though it was freaking cold out(!) while I did that I also scrubbed down the high chair so that can go into the attic. My hands were so frigid that I could barely move them… I would have also done the walker while I was doing everything else, but it does actually get cold here in Florida. The bed is satisfactorily cleaned (I love OxyClean!) and all set up! Wyatt was a little concerned when he saw is crib leaving our room. I think he was more concerned about where his crib toys would go though. He’s getting so big and I’m not too sure if I’m ready for him to be out of the crib. It makes me so sad when I think that another baby may not sleep in that crib… or another one of my babies. : (
Lately he’d wake in the middle of the night, get a drink of water and go right back to sleep… in his crib. He’d climb out of the crib and into our bed between 500-530am. Last night in the bed he woke for his water, but promptly climbed into the big bed. He curled up with me and fell asleep. My arm fell asleep and was killing me. I was afraid that without a crib barrier he’d roll out of the bed, so I just put him back in his bed… and that continued all night long. He definitely has more of a sense of freedom in his new bed.
I shaved Tom’s head today. He’s a sexy bald man now! Amberielle was quite disappointed and kept saying that she liked her Daddy the other way… the Daddy with hair! Although she has enjoyed rubbing his head! lol!
Amberielle has a Dick and Jane book that she is reading ALL BY HERSELF! Yay! She is over 100 pages into it so far! I am so unbelievably proud of her. She has only needed help with a few of the words… and they are hard words like “something” She is doing so well, and it makes me so proud to be a homeschooling mommy!
Speaking of homeschooling, my worry is what will happen if I go back to school. Will I be able to take care of my education as well as hers? Will I have time for both?
I need to find a source of income… I really do. I need something that I can do from home, and make some decent regular money with. I’m sick of feeling as though I don’t contribute… I know that I take care of the kids, and cook and clean, but when money gets tight, I feel guilty. I’m sick of money occasionally getting tight. I’m sick of having panic attacks when it does get tight. I’m sick of mentally selling things when money does get tight. Hubby hates it when I get myself so worked up, and is constantly telling me that I need not worry because he will always take care of everything, but I can’t help but worry. I’m a worrier by nature. I think that if I could find a source of at home income it would help me feel as though I have more control in the situation and help alleviate my guilt somewhat.

Stay away from the crackpots and other family tales...

Stay away from the Crackpots…
I had the outer shell of my crock pot on a low shelf. It was within baby reach, so it shouldn’t have been there, but it was just the outer shell, not any ceramic of glass pieces. Wyatt of course wandered over and stuck his head in and began sniffing… apparently looking for yummy smelling tidbits? Amberielle, always the motherly figure to him, goes over and tries to pull him away telling him to “Stay away from the crackpots!” I just about wet myself and replied, “He can’t… he’s a part of this family!”

My husband…
I’m sitting on the couch last night while T put His Princess to bed. He walks over to sit next to me and announces that he has just realized something, “God, I love these two kids more than I ever thought possible!” He had one of those WOW! moments of parenthood. Him, the man who swore he’d never have kids, and he’d never get married… and then he met me! : ) Now he’s been (hopefully! lol!) happily married for over five years and two children who think that he hung the moon. <3

Once Upon A Potty

Well, My Dukes is already showing signs of potty readiness. He takes off his diapers and promptly does his business on my floors… tinkle in the living room and poops in the dining room. At least he knows when he has to go. So over the weekend we went to Walmart and bought him a potty. No pressure, but it’s half in the living room and half in the dining room, so we’re covered. He was asleep when we assembled it, but as soon as he woke up I walked him over to it, took off pants and diaper and waited… sure enough he tinkled and the potty played him a song. We all clapped and made a huge deal. I took out the bowl to dump and clean it. While I was doing that he peed again on the rug in the living room… and while I was cleaning that up, he peed yet again in the hall.
It’s been an up and down adventure. Sometimes he makes it, sometimes he doesn’t. Sometimes he sits on the potty and tinkles while still fully clothed, other times he chooses to just stand in the potty and do nothing. Sometimes he’ll take off the diaper, sit on the potty, read a book, play around, stand up and then pee on my floor.
I’m happy that he’s showing interest in the potty, but I’m also sad. He very well may be my last baby, and he already is striving to be a big boy. Not to mention that this puts a huge damper on my cloth diaper addiction! Eek! Hubby has currently said that if Mr Man is so interested in the potty he cannot see spending money on more diapers that we really don’t absolutely need! *hyperventilating* But the sales! But the cute cloth covered bum! But the fluffy mail! Oy! I don’t think I am ready for this. I may NEED to have another baby just for the diapers! Did I just say that?

Pain in the neck...

I am once again, beyond tired… and I have this stomach bug again. I got over it before, and then my daughter got it, and gave it back to me as soon as she was done. Hey, at least she shares! Luckily my son has been spared. I just don’t think I could handle that at all right now.
Last night was such a bad night for the boy. He was tossing and turning all night long. He kept waking up and not for his usual drink of water. He’d climb out of the crib and into the bed, and I was so not in the mood to cosleep. He would lie with his head on MY pillow and scream and cry until I got my head of MY pillow. So I was uncomfortable and unable to sleep. He’d turn so that he’d be perpendicular to me and then I’d lose possession of my body pillow which would become his head pillow, my head pillow would become his leg pillow, and I’d get continuously kicked in the head, neck and breasts. I spent much of the night pleading with a 17 month old and essentially asking him to not kick the boobies that feed him.
I think that a large part of his problem is the fact that he cannot get comfortable in his crib. *sigh* Maybe one of these days we’ll get him a twin bed and he’ll be more comfortable and have more room and will in turn sleep better. Add that to the list with new dishwasher of things desired, but not quite needed.
And as a result of last night, my neck is killing me and I cannot turn my head. Hubby called and asked if he should work overtime tonight, and as much as we need the money, I need help with the kids. I am in so much pain, my patience in wearing thin, and baths and stuff need to be taken care of.

So, my stepmother arrived with her daughter. It still stands that she will not baby sit my children. Part of me feels guilty and unsure of how to say that there is a lack of trust without hurting feelings. And part of me just doesn’t care.

Well, T went into see his ENT today. His tonsils are still unbelievably infected that they don’t want to remove them until they take care of that. So he’s on a stronger antibiotic for the next two weeks, and then we’ll find out more.

I have having such a hard time being the sole adult in the house for dinner time. When my parents lived here it was so easy. I always had someone here to watch the kids while I cooked. Now that it’ just the three of us, since Tom doesn’t get home until late, and there is no way I’m making my kids wait until it’s nearly bedtime to eat dinner. So now, I’m trying to get us on a schedule where we’re eating earlier than we were while my parents were here, since I no longer have to politely wait for them to get here before eating. I’m having such a hard time getting myself motivated to start cooking earlier though. I have no idea why. I’m also having a hard time with the actual act of cooking dinner. It seems like every time I get on the kitchen side of that baby gate, one child hurts the other, or my mommy-sense starts to tingle and I know that they are doing something that they are not supposed to, or they’re at the baby gate begging for undivided attention, or drink, or drinks with ice, or drinks that don’t have that much ice in them, or… It’s endless. The crock pot has actually been a savior lately. I’m thinking about getting two so that I have a back-up for when one is soaking from a particularly messy stuck-on dinner. I knew I should have kept the second one that we got for our wedding. Ah well, I never really expected to use the one that we kept.

Well, my neck is hurting, so I guess I’m going to run and relax, make some tea and maybe do some scrapbooking or read a book.

Better Late Than Never...

Well, it’s 2006, so I guess maybe I should do my year in review before it’s, like June and would just seem like a silly thing to do.

In no particular order…
In 2005…

~I lost some friends… not to death, so there’s no need completely “Oh dear!” me. My life is better off without so much negativity.
~I found out who my real friends are, and who is worthy of my time, energy and love.
~I got my father (and subsequently, my stepmother) to move to Florida. He lived with us for 10 months and her for nine. I treasure the memories of the times that I had with him alone before she moved down.
~My baby girl turned 5 years old! : ( I cried. But I also finally finished writing her birth story. She had a lovely Strawberry Shortcake party by the way.
~My son turned, my baby boy turned one. I cried hysterically. : ( He had a fun Elmo party… but let me say, red frosting on an Elmo cake is a bad idea for a first birthday, or any baby party for that matter, my son was dyed red for days!
~I went through so much anguish as my son had to undergo surgery to repair a hydrocele. Again, I cried hysterically. He was of course fine and healed well, but I am a mommy and my heart was broken as it is whenever my children experience any pain.
~I began to conquer a deep yet paralyzing irrational fear… driving. I’m getting there. I am able to go out alone if I have to. I can take my kids to some activities and to the doctors if need be!
~I started Neurofeedback for seizure control. I stopped going when things got busy and the office seriously annoyed me. I may return at some point, I may not. I don’t know.
~I began contemplating my future and going back to school. Potentially to be a labor and delivery nurse, maybe a midwife, maybe a superhero! We shall see!
~My husband and I celebrated 5 wonderful years of marriage together. <3
~I began officially unofficially homeschooling my daughter. Officially because we get up, get dressed, follow a lesson plan and sit at the table. She gets out her backpack each morning and occasionally gets a nutritious lunch out of her Barbie lunch box. Unofficially because technically she missed the “standard cut-off age” to start school by one week. She is doing so well, and amazes people with her intelligence and wit. I am so proud! : )
~We made the full conversion early in the year to cloth diapers for my son. It has saved us so much money… or would if I didn’t have an addiction, and is so much better for the environment.
~I have made it well past the six month mark with breastfeeding my son. Here we are at 17 months, still going strong! Yay us! : )
~And it was a seizure-free year! Yay!

I think that’s it for 2005. It could have been better, but it also could have been a hell of a lot worse, so I’m not complaining.

So frustrated!

Did I post my stove issues here? I don’t remember… Anyway, a recap… Many months ago, my step mother was surface cleaning my stove and the numbers around the oven dial started to come off. The numbers are actually on the back of the stove and not the knobs. She was really upset and actually cried. We were able to salvage the lines and enough of the numbers so that with a metallic paint pen, I was still able to bake. From then on out we were very careful while cleaning the stove. Recently, I was cleaning the stove as I had many times with some Dawn… not a harsh abrasive or anything! I squeezed a little bit of water over the oven dial and whoosh, the numbers literally washed away! I wasn’t even scrubbing! WTH! Some of the lines were still there so I grabbed a towel and carefully patted the surface dry. I let it air dry while I ran in search of my paint pen from before… it wouldn’t write on the stove this time. I ran and grabbed more. Nothing would write on my stove… paper, yes… table, yes… stove, no! Crap!
I tried calling Sears and first they think the whole situation is hysterical. What did I clean it with? Dawn? Now they think I’m high… I’ve tried calling since and continuously keep getting put on hold. Ugh! I sent them an email yesterday and they suggest I buy new knobs… I did state that the numbers were not on the knobs and were on the back surface of the stove which is all one piece.
So now what? It makes it slightly difficult to cook and bake when you have little clue as to what temp the oven is at. I did manage to find a fat tipped paint pen that would write on it, but the digits are all smooshed and quite illegible. I was so hoping that Sears, the only place that carries this brand would be of assistance. Affordable assistance, I mean, I can’t afford to go out and buy a whole new stove, but I am terrified of even wiping it down at this point. Aside from the missing numbers, the stove is wonderful. It’s only a couple years old, has a beautiful ceramic cook top, and works like a dream. This just kind of sucks!